Notes: A good rule of thumb is to use a 2:1 grams ratio of potatoes to kale, but you can use more or less as you please. The bacon its can easily be replaced with bacon strips or other variants.

You would be surprised how long it takes to arrange ingredients to the necessary level of satisfaction for a picture.

Directions:

• Start by putting a pan filled with water on the stove. You will need this later to boil the potatoes in.
• Then start to peel the potatoes and slice the onions.

Don't tell anyone, but I only buy and peel potatoes for the recipe. Normally I use pre-made mashed potatoes. :))

• In case you weighed the potatoes before starting, you will lose some by peeling them. Make sure you still have enough left. :)

You don't actually have to do this step, but damn it I need to make sure I have enough potatoes.

• Put the peeled potatoes in the boiling water, and be careful not to hurt yourself. That part is very important.

Boiling water is said to be lethal to potatoes.

• You need to boil the potatoes for about 20 minutes. It's not a problem to boil them for longer, we intend to mash them - so they need to be nice and soft when they come out of the pan.
• Put another, big pan on the stove and fill it with about half a liter of water. Put the kale in it, but keep the heat pretty low to medium.

Oh my god we're so vibrant.

• Wait a few minutes and then use a skimmer or other spoon to push the kale into the water. Make sure it's all nice and drenched.

Ahhh, we're melting!!

• Put a frying pan on the stove and fill it with plenty of butter.

Butter is better.

• Add the bacon bits in and fry until they are nice and soft.

Bacon is also better, so butter + baron = amazing.

• Then add the onions into it and fry until the bacon gets crispy

Awwwww, yes.

• Once the potatoes are boiled nicely, take the water out of the potato pan and also take any remaining water out of the kale pan.
• Turn the heat on the pan with kale low, then proceed to put the potatoes into it.

This is the part where foreigners usually start to wonder what we're doing.

• Now we need to mash the potatoes and kale together. In the Netherlands, we use a special tool for this delicate act, but you can use anything you have lying around. A fork also works.

A food masher. Because we're ******* professionals.

• Now mash the food together like a crazy person.

I swear, my mother taught me this.

• Now, we're not done. Take the pan with bacon and onion and carefully throw the contents into the pan with kale and mashed potatoes as well.
• Be careful not to throw the bacon fat in - try to keep this in the frying pan, we need this to make gravy.

Mix more stuff together, MORE.

• Once you've done this, put a cup of water into the frying pan and turn up the heat. Scrape loose any remaining bacon or onion bits in the pan. This is done to make a simple gravy.

Serious note: Be careful with putting water into a hot frying pan.

The gravy should look a little bit like this after a while.

• After putting the gravy on the stove, take the smoked sausage and slice it into bits.

Beautiful smoked sausage. Too precious for this world.

The smoked sausage that was. 

• ... and throw that into the pan too.

Don't need to mash this part. ;)

• After putting the smoked sausage into the pan, add a few splashes of milk (not too much!) to the meal. Mix it around a bit while keeping it slowly heated.

What the hell. Now they're throwing milk in.

• Mix everything together some more and add salt and pepper as you please.
• Serve a healthy portion on a plate, and for extreme Dutch effect, make a little crater in the middle of the meal.

Remarkable.

• Then take the frying pan with gravy and carefully fill the gravy pocket.

Oh wow.

• And there we go.

Glorious.

Enjoy, and see you next time!